A successful career and a loving relationship are life goals for most people, yet balancing these two key ingredients for happiness is not always easy. Finding a sustainable work-life balance in a committed long-term relationship can take some time and effort, and sometimes an outside perspective on the situation may be beneficial.
If you are currently struggling with this challenge, you might find couples therapy at our Manchester centre useful. It can help you to work through your issues in a neutral environment, and give you fresh insights into what is and isn’t working for you. It will also help you to develop strategies for reaching and maintaining that elusive balance.
Here are some practical tips that can help you meet deadlines and also have quality time together.
Focus on being present for each other
Simply spending more time together isn’t always enough. For example, if it is just an hour at the end of the day when you are too tired or stressed to do more than watch TV or scroll on your phone, this isn’t going to foster a deeper emotional connection.
Try ringfencing some time away from screens or other distractions, such as mealtime or even just 15 minutes before you go to bed, to talk over your day and check in with each other.
Practice active listening skills so that your mind doesn’t wander while your partner is talking, and take a moment to think about your response rather than changing the subject or dismissing their feelings.
Don’t skimp on romantic gestures
The small gestures really can help to keep the romance alive in a relationship, as they provide reassurance that your partner is loved and valued. Acts such as preparing their favourite meal at the weekend or buying their favourite scent may seem inconsequential, but they are all part of a healthy and secure relationship.
Assess the bigger picture
It might be time to ask some bigger questions about you and your partner’s long-term goals and values in life: do they really align? For some people, their career is what gives them a sense of purpose and self-worth above anything else in life. For others, a job is simply a way to pay for life’s necessities while they focus on other interests and passions.
If your approaches to work and life are fundamentally different, it doesn’t mean that the relationship is doomed, but it might be helpful to have an open and honest conversation about your values and hopes for the future. This can help you to understand each other better and acknowledge your differences while exploring ways to move forward.
This might include practical strategies such as setting clearer work-life boundaries. For example, designating a particular area in the home for work, and having a cut-off point in the evening for answering calls and emails.